So far, all of the work I’ve done for my thesis has been so tentative and wary. I haven’t been set on anything from the beginning and it shows. I haven’t contacted anyone but Jesse because I don’t know what I need and I don’t know what I want out of this.
Working in a studio setting as an intern has been great. I’ve gotten lots of experience and I have a lot of fun at work. I think it’s what I wanna do when I graduate, but I think the way we do things there is creeping into my creativity. I like making style guides and logos at work- but is that what I want to do in my free time? I don’t think I should. I don’t think I would still find it fun if I did it all the time.
I’ve been feeling like this since I gave my first presentation. I realized how difficult the project would be but I wasn’t sure if it would be a good idea to just abandon everything. I knew I was going to give myself so many parameters. I knew I could make something nice and polished, but I didn’t know if I would really enjoy it.
I was about ready to give in and just make the city identity when Jesse approached me and mentioned the first email I sent her. I talked about how I wanted to figure out something weird and way more conceptual than a constrained city brand. That’s why I talked to Jesse – she knows how to get me to crawl back out of my comfort zone and do what I want to do the way I want to do it. And that’s what she did.
I don’t think I’m going to stick with the project I pitched. I don’t think I’d enjoy it as much as I would trying to do something more conceptual. I still want to create some kind of visual identity – I genuinely like doing that. But I think I need to find something different and less normal. Best to catch it early. I need to go look out a window for a while.
Melancholy 